Irony

It's been such rough days the past few weeks. Yet I enjoy those edges God had meant me to witness. Alhamdulillah for everything. And it has been so long since I pen down something personal (for me at least). Well... It's about time to be more transparent ha?


Honestly, walking to this phase is scary. I'm fully aware that I don't deserve this. But I know I want it. Being that kind of super stone-headed person who cares about no one (I mean... I don't let people define me like daaa who you are peeps lol), I fight for what I believe in. No matter how hard or odd, wait... Who odd and hard? LOL ><


Nevertheless, I can't ignore the tiredness. More like, boredom I guess. I love what I'm doing, and I love the people that I am meant to come across in this life, but I can't deny that I crave truth. I crave betterment. I crave contentment. Unfortunately, I need to take to 'snobbish' route, which people of the sphere might hate. Well. I don't even bother to be hated. But I'm sad. Sad. When the people whom I love, do not willing to wipe and widen the lens, where life has lots to offer. What a loser I feel.


The world is great. Of course, not as great as heaven. Why would God create the hereafter, if the world is less challenging? But yeah... Just enjoy the ride! It's pathetic to see the Earth collapse upside down. People could barely differentiate nice and good, achievement and knowledge, humble brag and stupid ass (sorry for that word... But yeah. Hegh). I'm not sure what would I answer God one fine day, once I stand before Him, have I done enough?


I may sound too critical I guess. It's not that I don't appreciate myself or enjoying life. I do. But I'm afraid I overboard. It's a thin lining of truth and wrong, and we can only know the result once the game is over. So... Do we got time to play around that much? Or care upon ourselves that much? It's super tricky.


Whilst I'm thinking of all these affairs (by myself ofc), it reminded me over time where I haven't yet found my troop. It's amazing how God meant me to relate most with those of the world, different ages and backgrounds, I never thought that way SubhanAllah! I just put on faith, I believe that He The Almighty never make mistakes by any means. Never!


But... That's the harsh truth of life. You may be rejected by people you called your tribe, but are well accepted by those who barely know you. That's weird. But not so weird, 'cause probably they accept you for the sake they just know the surface of you (but.. That's still great too). Or... You changed. You evolved. And the new you, is nothing close to who you were before. Hmmm... Tricky again.


Another harsh truth is...  Life is shades of grey ha? And... Life got seasons too. Just enjoy the season... Make full use of it, so that there's nothing to regret.


Kan?


Anyways... Alhamdulillah for all the good and bad.


Whatever it is,


May God Bless.


Please Ya Qawiyy.


Please.


And Ins...


Hang on.


Hang on okay.


Go Ins macho go


Tiberrr


~.^


Ins

20220628



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